in a winter terrorland

Merry (early) Christmas everyone. Today is Christmas Eve. And worst case scenario I'm stuck in a ditch on the side of I-39.

That's right, on this All Merry's Eve we are headed to the Land of the North, the Land of my Forefathers, the Land of the Frozen Tundra... Okay, okay, you get the idea. We're going to Wisconsin-- Green Bay to be exact-- to spend the holidays with my father's side of the family.

My father is the designated holiday driver. The man has no fear... He sees the ice, the snowy rain, the slick roads as a challenge to GO FASTER. So therein lies the very real possibility of us being stuck in a ditch. No worries though-- Webmaster Dan has already promised he'd steal his father's truck (it has a plow on the front) and come dig us out.

In preparation for the harrowing ride and eventual snow-in, I planned ahead.

I got several of these:
And a couple of these to start the dig out process while we wait for Webmaster Dan.

I already had a couple of these:
And several gallons of this stuff:
You know how this winter weather goes... I'd recommend stocking up now.

Not everyone is lucky enough to be gallivanting all over frozen Wisconsin with a madman at the wheel (just kidding!), but everyone can be safe on their travels and in their homes this holiday season.

Merry Christmas!

Not that anyone needs a reason to drink...

Especially with the holidays upon us... But here is one more big one:
How genius is this!?!? This thing has an internal database of 33 different types of wine. All you do is select the wine type and it will warm or cool the wine to the optimum serving temperature based on the type of the wine.

This chiller or warmer fits one or two bottles of wine at a time. There is a LCD backlit screen and CPU control for constant temperature.

Countdown...

We're almost there!

Is all your shopping done?!?!?!?! Mine is! (cue the evil laugh) Mwauhahahahahaha!

Stay calm... You have plenty of time... We're open til 5pm on the 24th.

You can find something for anyone, I promise:

Who wants to cuddle?

The wearable blanket craze is sweeping the nation, filling a void in our lives that I didn't even know existed! I'm behind the times a lot like that. As always, UFS is here to fill life's little voids in a cost friendly and fun way. "Cost friendly" being the $6.99 price tag and the "fun" being me modeling the Cuddle Up in our main store's center aisle. People were pointing... and laughing. And by "people" I mean Webmaster Dan.

Hands off me booty, me hearties!

Webmaster Dan and I were walking through the store when suddenly he stops dead in his tracks and gasps... I'm like, "What's going on there, crazy?" (I'm very sensitive and supportive like that).

He thought the above said "Booty Tray" not Boot Tray, which, obviously would be concerning on all levels. #1 Why would you need a tray for your booty? unless we're talking about a pirate's booty-- then really you'd want a caste or a sturdy trunk of some kind to store your booty. #2 Why would my father or uncle purchase a bunch of booty trays for the store? Do they know something I don't? Like there is a big market out there for a booty holder other than pants?

Don't worry... I made fun of Webmaster Dan something fierce for his confusion. And then I let him take this picture of me so that he could return the favor and mock me in kind.

cheaper than valium...

For some reason everybody thinks I'm... highstrung, for lack of a better word... When I was in pre-school I expressed myself with great passion, enthusiasm, and emotion. So much so that my mother took me off all sugar. At snack time in school all the other kids got cookies and koolaid. I had to bring my own sugar free apple juice and crackers. Awesome, right?

Well I'm back on the sugar but I'm not up on the caffeine a lot or anything. I'm just... EXCITABLE!

Anyways, the other day my smarty-pants mother brought me this:


Me: "What is this for?"
My Mother: "For you."
Me: "Why?"
My Mother: "It's cheaper than Valium."

Hot Puppies

I feel like this item sells itself:But let me just say... this puppy (get it? puppy? it's a hot DOG maker!) steams hot dogs to perfection. I googled it and they are asking 29.99 on the internet... Of course at UFS it's 9.99. I'm thinking of getting my man friend one... He loves his (unhealthy) ballpark food... Alas, his high blood pressure does NOT.

And in answer to your question... I have no idea why there is corn and eggs in the above picture. :)

ALERT!

We are almost out of our Holiday curios! When they're gone at these prices, they're gone. Don't say I didn't warn you. We do have a few of the very classy, very awesome race car curios left.

frankly, fantastic...

1 Sofa
1 Loveseat
1 Recliner
1 Drop Down Table
1 Lifetime Warranty
five people being able to put their feet up at once......
$999.00

Well, my mother, the furniture goddess, and super-hott Franklin rep have done it again... We have a Franklin sofa, loveseat and recliner in a lovely chenille cover for $999.

We only have a few of these sets left!

Black Friday post morteum

Well, Black Friday came and went. We opened at 6!!! And had (what seemed to be) thousands of customers all day long. And heck, who wouldn't want to come down when (a) store wide everything was 20 percent off and (b) we had our 19th Annual Liquor and Wine Tasting show.
People were stocking up for their holidays. I think a lot of people think like me...

Holidays=Family=A Need for Cocktails

I tried to see if I could go home with the owner of this cart:
Good news though... We still do have some booze left in stock! Don't take my word for it... Come down and see for yourself. ;)